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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25674454">Sir, That's My Emotional Support Assassin</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/HashtagLEH/pseuds/HashtagLEH'>HashtagLEH</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Avengers Family, Because Stucky, Bucky Barnes Remembers, Crack, Emotional Support Assassin Bucky Barnes, Fluff and Crack, Humor, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Protective Avengers, Protective Steve Rogers, Sort Of, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Is a Good Bro, but never really asked, do not take this seriously, it's just assumed, it's there, or accepted</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 10:22:10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,118</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25674454</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/HashtagLEH/pseuds/HashtagLEH</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“You want Bucky to be labeled as my ‘Emotional Support Assassin’,” Steve said flatly.</p><p>“ESA’s are very common – people do it all the time!” Tony protested. And then, “Okay, in fairness, when <em>most</em> people do it the ‘A’ stands for ‘animal’, but this is still totally legal!”</p><p>“I’ve had worse labels,” Bucky said with a shrug, and Tony pointed at him in triumph.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>275</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Sir, That's My Emotional Support Assassin</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I'm sure this has been done before, and I just haven't found it. Here's my take. Hope you like it!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They wanted to lock Bucky away for the rest of his life. “They” being the government – of the US, of Sokovia, of every nation in the EU, you name it. He had killed many people as the Winter Soldier, had toppled governments, and although it was clear from the leaked files online that he had not been a willing part in it all, the world wanted its pound of flesh and Bucky had the clearest face for it.</p><p>There were talks in the UN of holding a trial. The Trial of the Century, many were already beginning to call it, despite having no official summons for the former assassin. The only reason it wasn’t on rush was because Tony Stark Himself had promised to keep Barnes under lock and key at the Tower, and within a day of making this promise he’d tracked him down and brought him back.</p><p>When Steve found out what Tony was up to, he had gone tearing up the coast back to Manhattan, barging into the Tower and ready to rip apart walls in search of his Bucky.</p><p>And he had stopped short when he got to the common room, and found Bucky sitting on the couch, bowl of popcorn in his lap while watching the movie they’d made in the early eighties about Captain America, the super dramatized one that painted Steve and Bucky as <em>soulmates</em> and had gone out of production soon after its release due to the uproar about Captain America being <em>gay </em>and thus was now very hard to find, even with the internet, but Tony had made a point of saying how JARVIS could manage everything and had shown it to everyone at movie night several months beforehand. Natasha was sitting on the back of the couch, her legs falling to either of his sides while she braided his hair, and Tony was just reaching for the popcorn caramel on the coffee table when Steve burst in.</p><p>“Bucky,” was the first thing Steve said when he saw the brunette, looking clean-shaven and comfortable for the most part where he sat on the couch next to Tony. In response, Bucky gave a little wave with his metal fingers, looking far more relaxed than Steve would have expected him to be, considering that the last time he saw him he was pounding his face in with that same metal fist. Then Steve looked at the rest of them, hardly noting as Clint came in from the kitchen with a bowl of his own unique brand of popcorn, which included pickles, hot sauce, nacho cheese, M&amp;Ms, and peanuts, which Steve knew from experience was just as bad as it sounded. “What is going on here?”</p><p>“Cap!” Tony cheered. “Perfect timing! We’re only ten minutes into <em>Soldier On </em>– a surprisingly vague title for the <em>gayest</em> movie of the twentieth century – but we can start over! Clint, get that <em>monstrosity </em>away from me; we don’t need Elsa thinking that your shit is <em>normal</em>! Snowflake, don’t you <em>dare </em>let that filter into your programming – Clint is <em>not </em>an example you want to follow.”</p><p>Sam finally appeared behind Steve, huffing and puffing after his struggle to catch up with the super soldier, and gave him a thoroughly unimpressed look (that Steve was too stunned to notice) when he saw the others all gathered comfortably around the television.</p><p>“Get over here, Stevie,” Bucky huffed when Steve remained standing in the doorway, staring at them all with mouth dropped open. And Steve had always followed Bucky, not the other way around, so it was automatic to obey, dropping beside Bucky on the couch and staring like he was afraid Bucky would disappear when he wasn’t looking.</p><p>“Just snuggle into your ESA,” Tony directed, and squirted the caramel syrup into the bowl that Bucky still held. “Eat some popcorn. Kick back. Enjoy life. We have all the time in the world to worry later.” He shoved his hand into the bowl, coming back with a handful of sticky popcorn and shoving it into his mouth, even as he shouted to JARVIS to start the movie from the beginning.</p><p>Steve didn’t really think about what Tony meant until the next day, when Tony was showing Steve and Bucky some paperwork that he’d drafted.</p><p>“Is this a <em>joke</em>?” Steve demanded.</p><p>Tony looked vaguely insulted. “Of course not!” he declared. “You <em>obviously </em>need Barnes to function as a human and not a wind-up soldier. This will just make it official, law-wise.”</p><p>“You want Bucky to be labeled as my ‘Emotional Support Assassin’,” Steve said flatly.</p><p>“ESA’s are very common – people do it all the time!” Tony protested. And then, “Okay, in fairness, when <em>most </em>people do it the ‘A’ stands for ‘animal’, but this is still totally legal!”</p><p>“I’ve had worse labels,” Bucky said with a shrug, and Tony pointed at him in triumph.</p><p>“I totally have an in with the President,” Tony said. “I saved his life, so he owes me one. I get his signature, and basically he’s not going to give up your Bucky Bear to any other country, and you’ll be held accountable for anything he does in the future. So maybe don’t go on any murder sprees Snowflake, and you’ll be fine.”</p><p>“And what is it that <em>you </em>get out of this?” Steve demanded, raising an eyebrow.</p><p>Tony snorted, thoroughly unaffected by Steve’s stare. “I don’t have to be subjected to the ‘Captain-America-is-Disappointed-in-You’ stare of death, so that’s a definite bonus. Think of this as a marriage contract, if that makes you feel better.”</p><p>“Would we still be able to get married, with this?” Bucky wondered, and Steve swung his gaze to look at him, wide-eyed with surprise.</p><p>Tony scoffed. “Of <em>course</em>,” he stressed. “I made sure of it. Hashtag Stucky five-ever.”</p><p>“Bucky…” Steve stammered, “You want – us – me – to get…?”</p><p>“Yeah, punk,” Bucky said with a look at the blond like he was stupid. He shared a commiserating look with Tony, one that said, <em>‘I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with this idiot for so long’</em>, and on Tony’s part, <em>‘It’s fine – he’s <strong>your </strong>idiot now; good luck’</em>.</p><p>“I’ve been yours even when I didn’t remember,” Bucky went on, and Steve’s eyes were getting wet. “I <em>want </em>to be your ESA – you just need to sign the paper. I already did, see?”</p><p>Tony handed Steve the pen at the same moment Steve reached out to request one, and while Steve bent over the papers, wiping his eyes on his sleeve, Tony shared a smug look and a discreet high five with Bucky. He <em>totally </em>called that the not-so-accidental marriage proposal would be what finally swayed Steve to the idea. Clint owed him twenty bucks.</p>
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